Pastor Chris Mosley

  One common area of confusion for many Christians is the topic of divorce and remarriage. The Bible is very plain on this issue. We are going to take a look at this topic as taught in the Gospel according to Matthew chapter 19.

  We’ll start in verse 3 where Jesus is questioned by some members of a sect of the Jewish religious elite known as the Pharisees. Their question was. “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause at all?” Matt 19:3 “Some Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?”

   There was a debate among Jews as to what exactly was a legitimate reason for divorce. Followers of Shammai believed that the only legitimate reason for divorce is Sexual immorality. The followers of Hillel were more liberal and believed that one could divorce for many reasons, even trivial reasons.

  Jesus response was very Scriptural and challenged these teachers of the Law of God to remember the writings of God on this issue.                                                                              Matt 19:4-6 “And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who Created them from the beginning made them male and female,                                                                                                                                        5. and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?                                             6. “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let  no man separate.”                                                                                                                       Jesus was not going to side with either of the two rabbinical teachings, but with the Word of God.  Jesus quotes excerpts from Genesis 1:27 and 2:23 where God describes that fact that a husband and his wife are to share so close of a bond that they are to be considered one flesh or one body. He also explained that no man was to separate this union. So, in response, the Pharisees attempt to misquote the intent of the Law of Moses concerning the subject in order to discredit Jesus’ answer. Matt 19:7 “They *said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give her a certificate of divorce and send her away?

Ironically, the Pharisees inserted one word to change Moses intent,“command,” just like Satan inserted one word to misrepresent God’s desire for mankind in the Garden in Genesis chapter 3 that led to the fall of man. Genesis 3:2-4 “The woman said to the serpent, “From the fruit of the trees o the garden we may eat;                                                                                                    3. but from the fruit of the tree which is in the middle of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat from it or touch it, or you will die.’ ”                                                                                  4. The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die!”                                                 Jesus quickly corrects their attempt at misrepresenting the intent of Moses concerning divorce.  Matt 19:8-9 “He *said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.                                          9. “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, [ Greek word- (porneia) meaning sexual immorality] and marries another woman commits adultery.”  (brackets added)

   The scripture here is very plain. There is only one means through which a person can be divorced and remarried without committing adultery and that is if they know for a fact that their spouse has committed sexual immorality. Notice that Jesus changed the word, “commanded” to the correct word, “permitted”. He was not going to allow them to manipulate Scripture for the purpose of propagating their own religious agendas. Moses permitted or allowed them to divorce because some were mistreating their wives and some were even attempting to kill their wives in order to be free to remarry. Moses made this concession to deal with the hardened state off their hearts, not because it was a command of God. God stated clearly that He hates divorce.                                                                                                                                 Malachi 2:16 “For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the Lord of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.”

Today, as in both Jesus’ and Moses’ time, we still have a great on going debate about the simple Biblical teaching on divorce. Why? Because people still have hard hearts. They have not yet learned to yield themselves to the will and commands of God. We don’t follow God’s laws when we are selecting or dating a potential spouse, which in turn means we usually end up married to the wrong person. Christians are to marry faithful Christians and should only select their potential spouses from that pool.                                                                                      

2 Corinthians 6:14-18 “Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?                          15. Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?                                                                                                                                 16. Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, “I will dwell in them and walk among them; And I will be their God, and they shall be My people.                                                                                     17. “Therefore, come out from their midst and be separate,” says the Lord. “And do not touch what is unclean; And I will welcome you.                                                          18. “And I will be a father to you, And you shall be sons and daughters to Me,” Says the Lord Almighty.”

  Our goal as Christians should not be to select from the prettiest, or the wealthiest candidates, as does the world.  There is nothing wrong with looking for someone attractive, just as long as that is secondary to his or her sound spiritual qualifications.

  Often times when we feel that we have selected the wrong spouse we try to do as the people in Moses day and some sects of the Jews in Jesus day, which is rewrite God’s laws to suit our situation. Sadly many pastors, churches, and denominations have compromised with their people to keep the peace and allowed people to divorce for reasons like, their unhappy, and they don’t feel the same about each other. Sadly, these people are destined to live in adultery and outside of fellowship with God despite their faltering attempts to rewrite fundamental Biblical concepts on marriage and divorce.

  There are several excuses for divorce that have become acceptable in some Christian circles that are worthy to be addressed.

  #1 Content to dwell                                                                                                                      1 Corinthians 7:10-16 “But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband                                                                                                    11. (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife.                                                                     12. But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her.                                                             13. And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away.                                                                                                       14. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy.                                                                                                                         15.Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.                                                          16. For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?"

   There is a teaching that has surfaced in some churches that states that if a person is mistreating a spouse or leaves the spouse for one reason or another that they are now free to divorce the leaving spouse. The grounds under which they support this teaching is                    1 Corinthians 7:12-13. You will note in the Scriptures above that it is not phrased “pleased to dwell,” rather it is stated as “consents to dwell.” Pleased to dwell is found in the King James Version of the Bible and is poorly worded. The Greek words used here are translated more accurately agrees or consents to dwell.  The argument goes as follows: “if your spouse has left you or is mistreating you then they are obviously not pleased to dwell with you so you can now divorce them and remarry.” The first of many problems with this argument is that this does not line up with what Jesus said was grounds for divorce. Jesus stated in Matthew 19 that one could only be divorced when sexual immorality is involved. Now, either Paul and Jesus are contradicting each other, or some have poorly interpreted the passage on 1Corinthians 7. Obviously the Bible has no contradictions and all Scripture is inspired and profitable for teaching (2 Tim 3:16) so the problem is the interpretation.

  Paul was telling the Corinthians that they were to remain married to their spouse even if they were an unbeliever. His reasoning was that their godly behavior might win them over to Christ. Paul then instructed them that if the unbelieving were to depart they were no longer under the bondage of their spouse with regard to the woman being in submission to the man and the husband being liable to provide for the woman. This was not stating that they were no longer bound to the marriage. Once again, the Scripture clearly states that the only reason one can divorce their spouse and remarry is if the are guilty of sexual immorality. If someone is being physically, sexually, and  or severely mentally abused they may leave, but not divorce. They must either remain unmarried, or be reconciled to their spouse.

# 2 Doesn’t God want me to be happy?                                                                                    The answer to this question is a resounding yes! Of course God wants you tobe happy.       John 10:10 “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; Icame that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” However, you will notice that God does not state that happiness should be sought in unrighteousness. The Bible teaches the exact opposite.

Phil 4:6-9 “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.                                                               7. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.                                                                                                                  8. Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.                                                                                       9. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”                                                                                

Many people find this a hard teaching to accept. They feel that the criteria for divorce are too narrow minded and hard to follow. Perhaps that is because God hates divorce, as afore mentioned, and He expects people to be more selective and prayerful about their choices for a spouse.